


To Get Me To You

by LisaDuncansTwin



Series: Addictions [2]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: M/M, Sappy, Songfic, Written in 1999
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-31
Updated: 2013-07-31
Packaged: 2017-12-22 00:51:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/906956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LisaDuncansTwin/pseuds/LisaDuncansTwin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex wants to be with Fox and must come clean.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Get Me To You

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize about the song lyrics and the sap. Originally written in 1999 and betaed by Diana, left unaltered.

_Well I, I still can remember times_  
 _When the night seemed to surround me_  
 _I was sure the sun would never shine on me_

Fox, Fox, Fox...you’re all I can think about. You wound your way into my life when I wasn’t looking. You made your way past all my defenses and just set up camp in my heart and my head. I can’t imagine what my life would have been like if I hadn’t been assigned to keep watch over you. Now I can’t keep my eyes off you.

_And I, I thought it my destiny_  
 _To walk this world alone_  
 _But now you’re here with me_  
 _Now you’re here with me_

You have no idea that I’m there with you at every turn. Every time you pack and run, I’m right behind you, keeping you safe from everything that could hurt you. Even me. Especially me. I force myself to sit still, hold myself, when all I want to do is hold you. I watch you run head first into dangerous situations, and I pray every night that my presence is enough to discourage those bastards from fucking with you.

_And I don’t regret the rain_  
 _Or the nights I felt the pain_  
 _Or the tears I had to cry_  
 _Some of those times along the way_

I’ve told them in every possible way that you are not to be hurt, not to be touched, or they will know a pain unlike any they have ever imagined. They know I’m a man of my word. I’ll slaughter anyone who touches you or even thinks of causing you pain. 

_Every road I had to take_  
 _Every time my heart would break_  
 _It was just something I had to get though_  
 _To get me to you, to get me to you_

I killed the man that killed your father. I tried to warn him, but the assassin got to him before I could protect him, protect you. I’m not sure if you’d be happy to know that I avenged your father’s death. I know, maybe the punishment was yours to dole out, but I couldn’t let you become what I am. After all, we both know I am a murdering rat bastard, and good at what I do. 

_Well I, I still can recall the days_  
 _When I had no love around me_  
 _Makes me glad for every day I have with you_

I know that you and Scully think I killed her sister, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. I do admit that I was there, that I watched. There was nothing I could do to stop it, not without revealing my own secrets. 

_And I, I look in your eyes and know_  
 _I’m right where I belong_  
 _And I belong with you_  
 _Always belonged with you_

I want out. I want to be free from their control and their orders. I want more from life than I ever wanted before. I don’t just want to be alive, I want to live, too. I want to live with you, for you. I want to start over, be someone, anyone else, someone you could love. 

_And I don’t regret the rain_  
 _Or the nights I felt the pain_  
 _Or the tears I had to cry_  
 _Some of those times along the way_

I know that’s insane. What we had was based on lies, but what we felt for each other was real. At least it was for me, and I’m pretty sure it was for you too. You made me feel wanted, needed and safe, all without asking anything of me other than to care for you in return. We never spoke of love, there wasn’t enough time to fall in love, especially not with a gun in my back. But I want to. I want to love you. I want to be loved by you.

_Every road I had to take_  
 _Every time my heart would break_  
 _It was just something I had to get though_  
 _To get me to you, to get me to you_

You and I are a volatile combination. It seems like every time we come face to face all we do is fight. God, Fox, there are times when I want you to beat the living shit out of me, just so I can feel something besides this ache in my heart. I don’t have any clue how to get you back into my arms. You refuse to listen to me when I try to explain; you don’t trust a word I say.

_And if I could I wouldn’t change a thing_  
 _Wouldn’t change a thing baby_

Fine. Maybe you’ll believe what you see with your own eyes, hear with your own ears. I risked my neck for these documents and tapes; documents that show who was behind the murders of your father and Scully’s sister, tapes of conversations that prove me innocent of pulling the trigger, but show my guilt of other crimes. I’m letting you hold my future, our future, in your hands, hoping that you’ll come to me, let me come to you and work everything out. It’s all I want, all I ask. A chance. 

_Because your love was waiting there for me_  
 _Waiting there for me baby_

Please, Fox.

_To get me to you_


End file.
